Friday, June 27, 2008

Rant against the throbbing.

Ugh. Why does this have to be the worst at night? Sitting alone in my room, staring up at my ceiling, listening to the left side of my jaw throbbing. I am determined to wean myself off of pain killers, but I just would love for the deep tissue throbbing to stop for a while. This is the worst it has been all day, the day without vicodin (the day without vomit), but as the numbers on my clock reveal a new day, the pain only gets worse.

At least my typing is back to normal. I no longer am typing like I am drunk, meaning I am probably not high on opiates anymore. Hopefully that means that I am good to go for tomorrow: driving and riding and living like a half-normal person. All this home alone business has been getting under my skin. Not only home alone, but home alone in a sedated state, not really able to concentrate on much, worthless trying to read, vegged out in front of a computer or television, if not fast asleep.

Why is the throbbing getting worse? Can this really be from the five minutes I tried to pretend it was going to be okay for me to sleep on my side like normal tonight? True, it is better than last night, but still. Advil....start working!!!

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