Tuesday, March 24, 2009

I still can't get this right, but I attempt to explain myself again.

My family is fucking insane, and I love them for it. Funerals are funny things. It is not an event that one particularly looks forward to, but at the same time, it brings family together and people generally end up having a good time (or at least getting trashed in some fashion or another).

I think that death is a time to be sad, to let some tears flow, but is also one of the best opportunities to celebrate life. I loved my grandmother more than could be coherently put into a statement, but I also understand that she led a full life and it was her time. Life is not eternal; nor should it be. Rather, we should focus on life as it comes, each and every day. Yesterday I truly appreciated the family that I have, each and every one of them for who they are. I am okay with what happened because I have no regrets. Like I told my dad in the car, all that time that was set aside for "coffee with Mo" was worth it. I shared with her my achievements and my dreams and my fears, and I can't imagine that I would have had a better relationship with her any other way. I have plenty of stories, plenty of ways to remember her.

Sure, I'll probably cry again. I'm tearing up a little just writing this out, but in the end I think they are tears of happiness because there is really not much to be upset about.

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